Exactly how much do we love ourselves?
I’ve grown to abhor the idea of pleasing
people. But even as I recognize that, a part of me always leeches on thoughtful
considerations of manifold outcomes that may occur from one action or one
decision I might make. How pathetic is that? To live in contradiction of fear
and passion is a great way to live without really living.
The sad part is that nobody may understand
that, and if I care about what they think, I’m only playing into a vicious
cycle that will bite me in the ass. And if I don’t, I’m self-centered and I think
only of myself.
So what if I love myself? I want to love
myself.
There are so many important things that I did
not do, too many significant decisions that I made wrong, all in the name of
pleasing others. There are too many opportunities I have let go of. I have lost
too much time. And I’m only 21. Society is too big a concept for me to master. For
now, I just want to do what makes me happy. It shouldn't be that hard.
